Even the best and most loving parents can fail their children in this way. Many are simply raising their children the way they were raised themselves, unaware that they are failing to provide a crucial ingredient to their growing child. This is part of what makes CEN so invisible.
But the message that you get as a child is: Your Feelings Don't Matter.
And since our emotions are the most deeply personal, biological part of who we are, we hear this message as, "You don't matter."
So, you adapt to keep your parents happy, and you push your feelings down and away, so that they won't bother anyone.
That strategy works well for you as a child, but as an adult, you start to notice that you feel numb or empty. You have a hard time relating to other people and expressing yourself. You may have difficulty knowing what you want or what you need or what you feel. You may even feel ashamed for having feelings and needs, and get angry at your own mistakes, or for simply being human.